Instruction Manuals

When someone buys something that needs to be assembled, they often start with the parts that they can figure out on their own. If they encounter trouble in putting it together, they will resort to the instruction manual and glaze over the details to try and figure out what needs to be done next. If that doesn't work, they admit that they cannot figure it out even with assistance and entrust the instruction entirely to the manual and follow it faithfully. At least that's the stages I usually go through when assembling something.

But what about when we're trying to assemble our life? We start out and perhaps take the advice of our parents as a child. But gradually we start trying to just figure it out on our own. The problem is we aren't very good at it and we end up losing friendships, breaking promises, hurting others, developing addictions, and a vast array of other problems. (Doesn't describe you? Well maybe you're lucky... or maybe you're deceiving yourself. I suggest doing what a previous blog suggested and write an autobiography - a narrative of your life. It will either prove you right or prove you wrong, but it would be nice to know either way right?)

So what do we start to do once we realize that we can't just do it on our own? We start to glean the best parts of religion and incorporate it into our life. I believe all people steal the principles of faith - that are based on some notion of value of human life - and apply it to their life. We all have some sort of moral system that we believe in. But the problem is that we're not starting at the beginning of the "instruction manual." If you do that you not only get instructions for living, you get instructions for becoming a better liver. More clearly, you learn how to follow the instructions for living.

The problem is most of us know how to live better lives. Don't cheat. Don't lie. Don't steal. Don't let anger overcome you. But we don't know how to follow the principles we believe in.

[An aside from a psychological perspective:
I believe the problem is attentional because humans have limited attentional capacities. My research in multi-tasking as an undergraduate showed that we never do two (non-automatic) cognitive things at once but rather we merely switch back and forth in attention regarding them. So it is impossible for us to consider principles when we are cognitively engaged in another activity. I also believe that the problem is based upon improper orientations of moral beliefs. In Fruedian terms, most people implement moral beliefs using the superego, or the inner voice that tells you what you should and shouldn't do. But if we were to honestly believe that morals are based in self-preserving and society-preserving processes, then we could accept them rationally using the id.]

Is there a solution? Yes and accepting your own limitations and believing in the goodness of the moral principle is the first step. But here I will return to the assembly analogy - you cannot assemble yourself unless you accept that you cannot do it on your own and realize that you need to follow directions. By doing this we learn not to trust our intuitions and to merely follow directions to the letter.

So where are the directions to living, or spiritual directions as I prefer to call them, that I have been talking about? Well here are some of them: Bible study, prayer, confession, encouraging friendships, simplicity, fasting (from food, internet, radio, etc.), and solitude. Sound intimidating? You're not alone. Some of them I only do rarely because they seem so overwhelming. There are two things we do: stay humble by accepting that we can't figure it out on our own and study the lives of those who did live good lives (i.e. Jesus, Ghandhi, Mother Theresa). We make ourselves into students of living and we humbly accept the wisdom of those farther along than us. By doing so we get access to timeless wisdom about what it means to become more fully human.