Is Spirituality Psychologically Unhealthy?

During my time at Fuller I have often come across the notion that spirituality can often function as a defense from actually experiencing reality. In other words, what we often term spirituality may in fact just be a false show that deceives others and ourselves. I think it is important to consider because we should never pretend that just because someone says that they are turning over something to God does not mean they are properly dealing with the situation. I think some humility is required to accept the fact that we still don't "work our faith" perfectly.

But my reservation is this: is it possible to turn something over to God in a manner that is considered psychologically healthy? When do we stop trying to process something and finally make the decision not to worry about it and place it in God's hands? Sometimes I worry that there is a fuzzy line that we cannot always discern. In my opinion we never fully process life events. We never get over them; they always mark our lives. If that is the case then we should wonder when it is appropriate to claim God's grace for the event.

I think it takes a discerning, objective eye. We cannot trust ourselves to be in charge of our own spirituality. We need wise elders who can tell us when things that we claim to have turned over to God are really eating at our souls. There are a couple tell-tale signs that we have used spirituality improperly: we unconsciously do things to harm a relationship with a person we claim to have forgiven, we avoid prayer because of anger with God, we are completely unwilling to consider that we might not be fully surrendered to God in an area, or we are highly judgemental of others with a flaw that we feel we have been forgiven of.

If all else fails it does not hurt to revisit our past. It may take some time and energy but it promotes humility and the willingness to continue to learn from previous mistakes.